me, singing “Going Through the Motions” in 2007. Forever ago in internet years and it’s painful to hear now but OK.
I was informed, quite out of nowhere, that all seven seasons of Buffy the Vampire Slayer are on Netflix Streaming. This came as news, and I immediately rearranged my calendar accordingly. I admit I was a bit overwhelmed at first. When you’ve seen them all, and basically love them all, and are faced with the sudden and irresistible need to watch them all, it’s hard to know where to start.
I asked Twitter people to send me their recommendations for the best episodes and the response was overwhelmingly in favor of Once More With Feeling. Which is interesting! An important Buffy episode? Sure. A very memorable episode? Uh-Doy! One of the best? Hmmm!
Part of it is that I have high standards for musicals, you guys. I mean of course. And part of it is that I don’t think all the songs in this episode are that great. For me this episode has a couple of good songs, and a couple of amazing side-scenes, aaand that’s kind of it. A big bad I don’t care about. But whatever, I don’t want to fight about it. I just thought it was interesting. Does “memorable” equal “good,” the way “skinny” came to mean “pretty,” or “famous” came to mean “important”? I know, tough questions! And I don’t want any of us to hurt our brains thinking about it tonight.
The point is, the first song from the episode, the one I’m singing up there, will definitely be on the soundtrack album of my life, along with “Over and Done With” by the Proclaimers and something by Whitesnake and the sound inside the car at night on the trip home from Grandma’s. I recorded this forever ago, before YouTube, before the internet gave us an exact and immediate record of everything. Back when you still had to want things in order for them to exist. I found the lyrics online and reconstructed the song the best I could from having only heard it once, which is why the melody strays from book a couple times.
And so I’m writing about it now because of stuff happening offline that I’m not writing about, and it’s the kind of song that you identify with so deeply and truly, and actually you’ve always felt that way, and you wonder if maybe there’ll be a day when you don’t, when things will be OK and you don’t recognize or have need for that set of emotions anymore, and yes you want that to happen, but you also kind of hope it doesn’t.